Poop personified!

Read the sign (#280)

Good thing they don’t make bikes (#277)

Too _____ to bike (#276)

1-15-09. Oh, dang! (#224)

Nothing exciting ever happens here (#170)

Can't see the forest for the trees.

Bike Sale (#167)

To be fair, he was watching a show about biking instead of actually biking. It's the thought that counts.

Life is like watching a box of chocolates on TV (#166)

Bike Guy doesn't even own a bike, you didn't really think he'd run or bike across the U.S. did you? Pshh, yeah right!

“A rough ride” (#134)

I don't know if you can tell or not, but that is actually the Knight Rider car Bike Guy is driving. It's the 4-door version though. You know, for when the Hoff needed to take the kids to soccer practice.

New bike helmet, revisited (#126)

I really don't understand it either. What's wrong with dressing in Easter egg colors?

New helmet, Pt. 2 (#114)

I don't get it either.

New helmet, Pt. 1 (#113)

Fancy inventions + schemes to pick up women = my kind of science

“BSA” (#107)

There are others out there like you, no matter how weird your shit is.

Jumping on the bandwagon (#81)

The Rolling Stones are in the wagon, get it?

Trust me Mr. Cage, it wasn’t just that one. (#65)

OK, I'll admit: He's made a few good movies. But man, when they're bad they're SO BAD.

Love at first bike (#63)

OK, it's still cutting it for granny. But Bike Guy doesn't feel like hittin' that anymore.

They grow up to be blastocysts so fast. (#52)

When I have kids, you can bet your ass I'm going to have pics like this. Fake of course...

Keep your nose clean, kids. (#50!!!)

Ok, I'm not actually sure if you can get crabs in your nose. I kind of suspect you can, but I'm not really willing to test this theory.

Maybe I could just lean up against a nice one. (#44)

"Maybe I could just lean up against a nice one in the parking lot."

A cautionary tale that is simply bananas. (#41)

He wears a helmet for protection.

Big bulge not included (#36)

Isn't it funny that a guy would think it was totally rad to get a "nice balls" compliment, but a chick probably would get offended my a "nice tits" compliment. I know, I just blew your mind.

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